I will not divide or specify genders as I believe chasing harms everyone’s life balance they strive to achieve , apparently when one-sided. I know that men are hunter by nature and that is their task from the perspective of the human natural development, but nowadays women also have got the rights to chase and also say ‘no’ when not interested. The problem is not here hindering in the genders as we nowadays also have got same-gender relationships and we can look at them as more masculine and feminine energies rather than specified genders. The big issue lies in the not abundant so called ‘equal give and take’.
Saying all of that I am not admitting the role of a man chaser and hunter depreciated nowadays and it doesn’t matter. No, it is still in force (believe me as a heterosexual woman I always expect that!), what I want to say is that the opposite side in the chase should not stay passive , if really and truly interested. As everyone wants to be flattered, chased, desired, paid attention and loved, don’t we?
The chasing when not met by equality from the chased side becomes toxic as it hurts the chaser’s feelings or obsessive that could lead in worst cases to a more serious mental disorder.
What the characteristics and consequences of not-healthy chasing (‘healthy’ I determine the one when chased back, a reciprocal one)?
1. Your interest pays you less and less attention. Or, either they pay attention out of kind heart.
Can you imagine I am having my favourite food 24 hours a day? First I will enjoy it, then I will like it and then gradually lose interest and finally hate it. Apparently if I didn’t request having more of it, but someone’s serving it for me without asking me, but just they know I love it. Imagine yourself in this role. From a big appreciation and even love your feelings turn quickly in disgust.
Whatever you do it should be reciprocated. If you see you are trying for the 3-rd, 4th time without response, just let them be, let the person come back when they are ready for this.
2. The obsessive chasing is lack of self love. It’s shouting that you feel not enough. Unfortunately none likes people that have got overbearing confidence but also people that have got extremely low self esteem . Even if you don’t show it, people intuitively pick up on this energy.
3. Women that chase and label that by being ‘friendly’. Come one, girls, you serious? Why have you ever thought men didn’t catch up on your energy?
4. Chasing is a turn off as you look desperate. Some people will respond with compassion, another will be disgusted and none ever with the love you are after.
5. Some of the chasing pursuits might finish well and with completion, but you will never get what your person of interest truly feels.
6. If the connection has started with not equal give and take, do not expect the relationship to continue miraculously with reciprocity.
7. Feminine energy should not initiate first contacts, plans etc if they want to be really conquered. Masculine shouldn’t pursue further if the woman doesn’t respond back after the third pursue.